When I was a kid, salad consisted of lettuce, tomatoes, capsicum and cucumber. There was only one type of lettuce, iceberg lettuce. Salad dressing was made from salt, olive oil and vinegar. I added paprika once because it looked good on the cucumber but had to take it off again when my sister complained. For years I thought of salad as healthy but boring. Then I found out that iceberg lettuce was the least nutritious variety and that there were so many other possibilities. Now I eat cos and coral lettuces and little bags of lettuce mix (well, I don’t eat the plastic bag).. I like mustard greens too, and baby spinach and I always add a few leaves of gotu kola to my salad. It tastes vile but it’s rumored to extend your life, barring unforeseen accidents, of course.

Each type of lettuce belongs, more or less, to one of four groups:

• Looseleaf, where the leaves separate easily, such as oak leaf
• Butterhead, which have round, smooth leaves
• Crisphead, such as iceberg lettuce, where the leaves are tightly packed
• Romaine, or cos, which has long, rather than round, heads

Then there are all the other salad greens, like rocket (which I’ve also seen spelled ‘roquette’ or ‘arugula’), shaped like dark green oak leaves and quite bitter tasting. Also, ubiquitous, I think it must be discounted for restaurants because it’s served with just about everything.

According to one website I read, wild lettuce is a semi-narcotic relaxant, which was used by the Romans to induce sleep. It came to Australia on the First Fleet. Three different varieties were planted in Sydney and Norfolk Island but by the time I was born, there must have been only the iceberg stuff. Iceberg lettuce is still the number 1 lettuce sold in Australia (despite all the rocket they serve in restaurants).

The darker the leaves of a lettuce, the more nutritious. Red or purple in the leaf indicates the presence of vitamin A. Vitamins C and K are also present in lettuce (don’t eat if you’re on blood thinners) and so is folate (which is good for women of child-bearing age).

Lettuce should not be stored near ethylene gas-producing fruit, such as apples, pears or bananas, they accelerate the lettuce’s deterioration. Store whole lettuce, unwashed, in an airtight bag or container, in the fridge crisper or bottom shelf for up to a week. Wash the leaves and pat dry before serving. I had a friend who used to dry the leaves lined up on her kitchen table or the preparation bench. Maybe there’s a market for a lettuce rack, with teeny tiny lettuce pegs.

Not done with whimsy yet. Did you know that lettuce is a popular business name:

• Lettuce.com is an agency that is all about deep web. This means that they design your online strategy. No doubt they have templates for doing so but written just right on their website, it sounds impressive
• The Slug and Lettuce is a pub in South Australia
• French Lettuce is a patisserie. They make wedding cakes and vanilla slice